Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Monday, February 27, 2012
Sunday, February 26, 2012
When the Illness Tide Turns
Posted by
RownDivision
at
12:11 PM
Wait a minute. I'm the sick one here. I have the mysterious pain condition that gets me a first class ticket on the medical specialties train. You ask me how am I doing today. You notice the slightest blip in my demeanor and wonder if I forgot to take my meds again. You come to my medical appointments with me to be my buddy and my memory.Richard got the news from his cardiologist that his heart is showing signs of enlargement. We have known he has a congenital valve issue and that some day (in a galaxy far, far away I always thought) he would need heart surgery. Over the past couple of months he has had blood work, worn a twenty-four hour halter heart monitor, had a treadmill stress test, and had a two and a half hour cardiac MRI (which experience his brother describes as akin to being in a coffin on a construction site). We are lining up the specialists for him.
The worry-vane is now being spun about by his condition. I had grown used to him being the allay-er of anxieties and the carrier of hope for my recovery. It's been a long time since I thought of him as fragile in any way. He has a damn black belt in Tae Kwon Do ! If that's not a guarantee of longevity, even immortality, then what is?
I am, of course, doing my best to show him the amount of concern he can tolerate and the level of optimism I truly feel. I am feeding him beets and spinach and kiwis and quinoa. He has, with my quiet acquiesence, taken over control of the TV remote control device. I try to make him laugh. I hold him close.
I don't like this new equation. I'd prefer to be the sufferer than the one bearing witness, helpless to make it all better. We have, thankfully, lived long enough so that the illness tide is turning, and Richard is getting swamped. In my heart, I do know that one thing we excel at is holding hands and rowing together. It's my turn to build up some calluses.
Has this kind of turn ever happened in your relationship?
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Friday, February 24, 2012
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Monday, February 20, 2012
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Bronchiectasis: Relief can be Found the natural way
Posted by
RownDivision
at
9:03 AM
http://www.naturalnews.com/034870_Holy_Basil_tulsi_antioxidants.html
Saturday, February 11, 2012
Broken Heart Syndrome
Posted by
RownDivision
at
7:36 PM

Richard and I have joked that we want to die at the same moment at the age of 90 while scuba diving of Grand Cayman Island. Neither one of us wants to survive the other for very long. What follows is a sad-sweet story of a long-term partners who died minutes apart from each other.
"James and Marjorie Landis of Westmont, Pa., were married and inseparable for 65 years. They died this week just 88 minutes apart.
Marjorie, 87, passed away Monday after a long illness.
James, 88, died an hour and 28 minutes later of a heart attack. He was at his wife's side when she died.
"The last thing he said to her was, 'It's OK. I love you. We had many good years goether. I will see you real soon,'" said the couple's granddaughter, Erin Miller.
'I just think he died of a broken heart. I don’t think they could have lived apart from each other.'
The cause of the death of bereaved longtime spouses, the study found, can be a condition known as takotusbo cardiomyopathy or sudden heart failure linked to an emotional experience. Some experts have dubbed the condition 'broken heart syndrome.'"Thursday, February 9, 2012
Monday, February 6, 2012
Sunday, February 5, 2012
Thursday, February 2, 2012
What Happens When the Caretaking Partner Gets Sick?
Posted by
RownDivision
at
9:43 AM

She is in her late fifties. A financial planning executive with a successful bi-coastal business that requires frequent flying and rushed meals. While not athletic, she has always been active. In that out-of-nowhere way that illness sometimes hits, she came down with a systemic infection that flattened her and almost literally took her breath away. Sitting exhausted her, and any activity left her panting for air. She has been treated for the past six months with a combination of antibiotics, steroids, and rest. She is not who she was, and is still discovering who she can be.
Her husband has been a loving and attentive caretaker. He took charge of their interactions with the world - from grocery shopping to medical specialist hunting. When she was too exhausted to shower, he bathed her. He went to every doctor visit with her and remembered the information she was too distracted to hold onto. Her job was to rest and recover. He took care of everything else.
Then, he was clipped by a car while riding his bicycle. His ankle was broken. Now he is in pain, and his mobility is severely limited. And he feels rotten - for himself and for the ways in which he can no longer help her.
They are trying their best to be kind and loving to each other; that has always been their way. But pain and exhaustion take a toll on the best intentions.
They have a community of friends who are pitching in to help. And they have an excellent collection of take-out menus from restaurants that deliver.
Underneath the practical and emotional strains, they are strong, and they are scared. A lot - like laundry and work projects - doesn't get done. They look to the future for signs that things will get better because the present is one big ball of uncertainty and hurt.
Have you ever been in the situation where the caretaking partner got sick or had an accident? How did that affect your living situation? And what helped you cope?
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